Wednesday, October 24, 2007


We're not nice people. I'm just forewarning you so you won't be too surprised when I tell you this next weird, quirky thing that we do. Just keep in mind, I already know we're not nice, so don't pepper me with comments about how mean we are. I already know!

In the course of our married life, Rhett and I have had the opportunity to move around a little bit, and every time we do we have to meet a whole new group of people at church. But sometimes we're a little bit lazy about learning names at first. But we still like to talk about people (especially crazy comments that they might make in church, etc.), so we have our own system of describing people to each other. And it's kind of mean.

We nickname people. Here are some of the nicknames we have used over the years to help each other understand who we are talking about: Man-Talker (obviously a woman with a very, very deep voice), The Giants (This whole family was over six feet tall! They were huge!), Big Hair Lady (I think this one speaks for itself), The Weasleys (a family of redheads), and my favorite, Chick-a-Bam-Bam-Ban-Ow! (let's simply say that there was a very . . . um . . . interesting sense of style associated with this one).

The problem is sometimes (like in Chick-a-Bam-Bam-Ban-Ow!'s case) occasionally we would get to know these people and really like them. But still, we called them by their nickname in private because as I think I've mentioned before, we're just not that nice. But we did feel a little bit of guilt . . . but not enough to make us stop nicknaming. Another drawback was that Ivy picked up on the Chick-a-Bam-Bam-Ban-Ow! nickname and she started saying it whenever she saw that lady too. She was two years old, so we really should have been teaching her to be nice. But whatever.

One time my brother Josh (you know, the famous organist power player) came to church with us. Rhett was pointing out all the people whom we had nicknamed. He looked at us like we were crazy mean (which we are), and then he pointed to a woman in a wheelchair. "So, what do you call her? Hot Wheels?"

"That is SO mean!" I protested. But I have to admit, that's what we called her from then on. I just recently thought that maybe other people do this too, and I wonder what they would nickname me. A few thoughts: "Lady who can't dress her kids in matching clothes," or "Horsey" (since I rarely am seen these days without an accompanying ponytail . . .) or maybe "Pauncho" (since I haven't quite lost the belly from my three children).

What nicknames have you had for people? (And don't pretend you're all better than me, you know you do this, too!) What do you think people would nickname you?


Amy said...

ok as I am reading this I could picture people from old wards that fit those nicknames. Doug and I do the exact same thing. Except usually we keep it simple...all boys are Billy and all girls are Sally. This worked fine until our neighbors moved in next door and their names were Billy and Cindy. It screwed him and he has never been the same since. I love nicknames ..I want to know what you guys call me! It is bad I know it is bad huh! I am so intrigued. I would give out nicknames that we have used, but then people would find my blog and link to you and read what I wrot eand be oh so offended. So way to be brave!

Sibri said...

Oh come on Heid, you are so not alone with this one I mean... WE nicknamed Selma and Louise!

I do it all the time, as do Selma and Louise!

I have names for people who catch the bus with me to work every morning... like the miserable looking lady who stretches out every morning and goes to sleep... I call her 'Slumber Party' I mean you just wouldn't want this lady at any party! ( she's probably lovely really and just not a morning person) Then there is the a little guy who never stop talking to the driver I call him 'pee diddy' (don't ask why) Then the lady in the green coat who when she gets off the bus runs down the road... I call her 'Runner Bean' then there's 'Lipstick' 'Happy go lightly' and on and on it goes!!! No harm done I guess.... they'll never know hehe

Lindsey Jo said...

Heidi- I laugh because Jordy and I have the same bad habit. "Wolfie" is the ward chorister who Jordan says reminds him of Wolfgang A. Mozart. "Wedgie Girl" is a little three year old that ran around with a permanent wedgie all summer and so kindly enough her mom is "Wedgie Girl's Mom". And then we have Sean "BytheWay" Morrison because he is always telling us at church to write down our feelings and impressions as we listen to his talks. We just call him Bytheway.

Leisha said...

We must be mean too, we always do this. It is the only way my husband remembers anyone...he must give them a descriptive nickname. Like, "The Hairy Patch" (please don't ask...) or by food they've brought to events "Sister Holy Guacamole". There are more, but I don't want to paint us in a worse light than I already have. If I had a nickname it would probably be "Sister Jelly Belly" or "Sister Screams a Lot" It's okay, I can take it.

Josh said...

You forgot to mention that "Hot Wheels" is really ugly in addition to being disabled.

carl b smith and marilyn said...

Ouch! Who is this Josh guy? DAD