Friday, March 25, 2011

The Essence of Jakers

Last week Rhett had Friday off work (one of the numerous perks of working for a company which produces enough missiles to destroy the whole world fifty times over is that he gets every other Friday off--Hooray for Missile Proliferation!), so we hucked the kids in the car and took off. We told them we were going to Atlanta (two hours away) to shop for furniture (they are innocent and will believe anything obviously).

Instead, we drove to the beach in Florida. It was, as my Korean friends said, very much excitement trickery.

We played on the beach, ran away from waves, and went out to eat at our favorite seaside taco bar. It was, quite frankly, super fun.

When we got back in the car after a whole day of merriment and splashing and sand castle building, Jakers said, So now are we going to furniture shopping?

Oh, sweetie, I said, We just said that to trick you so that you wouldn't know we were really coming to the beach. Wasn't that a fun surprise?

He screwed his little face up. He wailed, Why would you trick us? I really wanted to go furniture shopping!

And that is what it is like to be Jakers mom.

Sunday, March 20, 2011

Oh, Barbie Sing-Along.

Today I found myself singing along to a Barbie movie with my daughter. Not just singing along as the movie played, because Veevs had gone to that sing-along section under the extras where they put the words across the bottom for you. Thanks, Barbie. I needed that.

We were singing to The Princess and the Pauper and if you're wondering how it is that my daughter has a Barbie DVD, well, so am I. But there I was, laying down vocals with my seven year old. Vocals like this: "If I want eggs, I snap my fingers, and the maid comes running in." I sang with joy.

After a particularly moving duet, Veevs put her little arms around my neck. Thanks, Mom, she said, I really love singing with you.

And suddenly, it really was joyful to be singing Barbie duets with my daughter.

UPDATE: Lest you think it is all joy and love and singing and Barbie at our house, this morning Veevs wailed to me upon completion of her hair, "Maaaa-uuumm. You braided it!" Like I am the village idiot. So, that's normal.

Thursday, March 17, 2011

A Do-Nothing Morning

This morning I woke up, and instead of taking on all my full responsibilities (breakfast, chores, blah) I felt like reading.

So I did. I read Haven Kimmel's new book She Got Up Off the Couch, and I loved it. I stayed in bed, leisurely reading. I got up off my bed whenever a child's voice got so strident that it interfered with my concentration. I got up off my bed to get everyone breakfast (cereal in a bag and an offer of a Go-gurt). I got up off my bed to wipe Logan's nose (a dozen times), and I got up off my bed to fetch some toys that would keep Logan happy until nap time. Here's the problem with my love of reading: once Momma starts reading, Momma can't stop reading until the book is finished. So, yes, I neglected my kids until I finished the book.

It was totally worth it.

My kids will look back on days like this (which I cheerfully named a "Do-Nothing Morning" and advocated liberal amounts of television) with fondness (I hope). Maybe they won't. That's okay, too. Modern motherhood, I'm convinced, would be so much more freeing and fulfilling if we would all just admit we're kind of crappy at this, save up money for our children's future therapy, and let it go.

Friday, March 11, 2011


I have not mentioned before (primarily because blog writing has been paralyzed lately by my desire to be both funny and completely inoffensive to every person on the planet--don't worry, I'm over that now.) but almost all my friends here in Montgomery are Korean women. They are all here because Hyundai has a plant here and their husbands have come to work in some related way to the Hyundai plant.

Some of the awesome things about this:

1) They make me Korean food. All the time. Seriously, my calendar is filled up with lunch dates to taste a different Korean delicacy. I like most of the food. They never want me to cook, which is kind of a slam to my cooking, yes? Also, to American food in general. I invited one of my friends to eat lunch ("lunchee!" as she says it) here, and she said, "I cook? I bring food? No, you not cook. I not eat food."). I have to say, it doesn't make me feel like my cooking is valued in the way it should be. In fact, it is just like having my own kids react to my cooking every night at the dinner table.

2) They don't really speak English, so our communication is limited. But also, very, very enlightening. For example, today my friend told me that she no understand heads of foreigns because they no think Korea people and Korea people very difficult understand. I am not sure what this means exactly but I liked the thought, and I nodded wisely as if I understood.

3) I am the token white girl. I never knew this would happen to me, but yet, here I am. And I am reveling in it.

4) They find my little red-headed baby to be the most delightful piece of human flesh ever. But then again, so do I. Do you?

That's pretty much the high points. I like my new Korean friends, and not just because they're my only friends. They are also awesome. You should try the pork. It is delicious.

Giraffes and Such

I am sure that I am the only person still visiting this page, and even I only use it for the links to blogs, but still.

Tonight I was snuggling in my bed with sweet Veevs, who likes to have what we call "Talky Time" with me before she goes to bed. It is, in fact, time wherein we talk. Not much symbolic there.

Anyway. She had a few questions about mating, specifically, how it related to dogs. How, she wondered, could a dog get out of its own, safe, platonic backyard, pair up with a philandering mutt, and then come back pregnant with mongrel puppies? I never shy away from these questions, if I can help it, and while I am also expert at vague and not-so-informational answers ("When two people love each other very much . . ."), tonight it was clear that she wanted science, not platitudes.

So in two or three sentences I bequeathed upon Veevs sexual information that, if used in the right way, could make her queen of the playground (also, hated by other parents).

She thought about that for a minute. Wait, she said, is that the way all animals mate?

Yes, I said.

Another pause. That, she said, must be hard for giraffes.

I laughed until my sides hurt (but did not explain the finer details of the animal kingdom's prowess. Like National Geographic can't do it's share of sex education?).