Tuesday, August 12, 2008

Wherein I Realize It's Genetic . . .

So, twenty hours in a car with my kids. That was awesome. Fortunately, on the return trip I had corralled my husband into flying into Vegas and then driving home with me, because really, what else was he going to do with his weekend? I mean, it's not like he mows the lawn. (I can now tell you this little detail: we pay a neighbor boy to come and mow our lawn because Rhett is "busy" with school. I have previously been prevented from sharing this mundane detail of our lives only because Rhett was afraid his father would disown him forever when he found out. But I outed Rhett during this vacation anyway, and so now you know! What other secrets am I keeping from you? You'll never know! At least, not until I'm authorized to share them.)

Anyway, this trip opened my eyes to a few things. I realized that Rhett is the worst backseat driver ever. He was always like, "Hey, Heids, don't accelerate so fast on the on-ramp. You're killing our gas mileage," and all, "Hey, watch out for that semi!" because semis are apparently hard to miss.

My children do not appreciate Dairy Queen. The people who frequent Dairy Queen do not appreciate my children. Enough said.

Spencer is all of a sudden a little boy instead of a toddler. How do I know? Potty talk, that's how. We're cruising along watching the Backyardigans and the Backyardigans sing, "Now it's time to have a snack!" while Spencer gleefully sings, "Now it's time to pee in the toilet!" He then proceeds to laugh at his own little joke.

Rhett and I exchange mystified (but still amused) looks, like, "Where did this come from?"

A short time later, the Backyardigans sing, "The corniest station in the nation!" while Rhett sings "The horniest station in the nation!" He then proceeds to laugh at his own little joke.

I don't exchange mystified looks with anyone this time. I'm suddenly very clear on where this came from.

Thanks, Rhett.


Carol said...

Yay you are back. I missed you. Next time you leave for three weeks let me know I am coming with you. I can only imagine the wonderful time you had.

As I was reading what Spe said I thought to myself that is so something the boy hadley would utter and be amused by himself.

Did Dan survive the disappointment of Rhett being too busy to mow the lawn? That must have been a massive blow.

JustRandi said...

You crack me up!

That Dairy Queen thing is tricky. I mean, like ice cream and chocolate is enough to keep kids out of trouble. What are they thinking, and when will Dairy Queen wise up and install play equipment like everyone else?

Glad you're back!

Jill said...

I bet you can't you wait until he starts singing that cute little song in church?

Glad you're back!

Leisha said...

Yes, I get the same gas mileage comments. I was banned from driving to all our family events the last 2 weeks because I like to get there all fast and furious and evidently this costs like 10 cents extra per mile or something? I don't know.

P.S. I feel it is sacrilege, as Texans, to not enjoy DQ. We still like them, even though we tried to sneak our dog into one last weekend and got kicked out. (We had to is 108 degrees in the car for heavens sake!)

Anonymous said...

Glad to know I am not alone with a horrible "back seat driver" husband!

a Tonggu Momma said...

Glad you are back! As to Spencer's newfound love of crassness... can I just say I hate that stage? And I hate even more that it lasts for... oh... about 25 years.

The Rookie said...

And she's back and funny as ever.

I think Rhett and Spe would fit in quite nicely with my down-to-earth and/or crass (you decide the adjective here) family.

Jen said...

Yay! Now it's time to have a laugh.

The Motherboard said...

Ho-boy! Do up your seatbelt, cause the little boy talk is about to begin! It's awesome fun when they shout out stuff like that during the closing hymn at church.

Good times!

marisa said...

I love it Heidi! I have missed reading about you while you were on vacation! And just so you know I haven't posted anything on my blog while you were gone so my life didn't keep going on while you were gone! As for Spencer's new songs I love it ! I keep telling my husband he needs to be quiet or his girls are going to be saying all sorts of things he really doesn't want them to say. Actually while my 20 something brother-in-laws lived with us this summer the girls came up with all sorts of new phrases that I am slowly trying to break them of!