CLICK HERE FOR THOUSANDS OF FREE BLOGGER TEMPLATES »

Monday, December 8, 2008

I Don't Want to Say I'm Paranoid, But I Might Be Paranoid

I don't think I'm paranoid, really. Except sometimes I wonder.

Like the other night I pulled into my subdivision and the car that was behind me on the main road pulled into my subdivision, too. Instead of thinking, "Hey, neighbor!" I immediately assumed it was a stalker.

Especially when it turned on to the road that leads to my road right after I did.

I was all like, "Quit following me, you freak!"

So of course, I passed my street so that freak wouldn't know where I lived. Or at least so they would think I lived in a different house from my real house, because I'm not above pulling into someone else's driveway and acting like I'm home. I might even check the mailbox, just to complete the facade.

Except that person wasn't really following me. They turned off at the next street.

So I sheepishly did a U-turn and drove back to my real house with my real children. I don't tell Rhett about these things. I think they might worry him.

17 comments:

Jillybean said...

I thought that I was the only one who did that.

julie said...

Me too!

Carol said...

I have SO done this.

I am neurotic, like you didn't know that already.

Bisel Family said...

I so do that!

JustRandi said...

I do that, too!! I'm so happy to be paranoid with so many nice people.

amber johnson said...

O.K. I don't know if I know you but I am Sarah Rader's friend from Utah. Anyways, I somehow happened onto your blog (because your post title caught my attention off of Sarah's blog)and I have been laughing ever since. I can totally relate to your paranoia, I'm sorry to admit - but you're not alone out there. I have done that before. Your posts are so funny, so I might have to come back for some more laughs. - Amber

The Rookie said...

I feel so much more normal now. I do stuff like this (go around the block, take an alternate route) if I happen to be following someone else so that they don't worry I'm stalking them.

Alice said...

Apparently we share the paranoia, which means we are really the normal ones right? I am totally convinced that cars are stalking me. I also seem to find cars that pull up next to me at a stop light, especially if it is late at night, then I can't look over or I will be their next drive by shooting.

Because every car is just waiting to shoot someone else right? ;)

Heather of the EO said...

Everyone else keeps saying this is normal behavior. You can't peek at other people's mail, it's a federal offense or something.

But the rest of it... yeah, totally normal.

bill, katie, and co. said...

Been there. Done that. Did it just the other day. Glad to see I am not alone in my freakishness.

Cathy said...

I guess we're all a bit paranoid!

monkie mama said...

Heidi, you are a crack-up!

Now, on a totally unrelated note. . . I just had to let you know that I heard a Kenny Rogers song yesterday and couldn't help picturing you, holding a microphone and crooning along. If you have never heard the song "Once upon a Christmas" by Sir Kenny and Dolly Parton, you're missing out. It's a good'n. :)

Sara said...

dude, i need your address-
sbschofield@yahoo.com

Beeswax said...

Is only being careful. Duh. People that go straight home are pretty much asking for a stalker.

Sue said...

Hey Ms. Heidi - can you email me? I need to ask you a question and can't find your email address...

Anonymous said...

Who doesn't do that? My kids used to say "mom you just passed our house", as I was driving by making sure I wasn't being followed.

Sibri said...

Heidi, I just love you to bits! Don't ever change! x