Wednesday, November 16, 2011

In Two Weeks There Will Be So Many Children Here They Will Surely Be Neglected

I am not a good blogger. Let us establish that immediately, and then please feel free to leave comments to the effect of how much you've missed me. Those kind of things do wonders for my sense of self-importance. (Rhett will wonder how much more self-importance I could possibly acquire, but I think we have also established that Rhett is not a reliable source for insight into my character. Except one time he did say to me that even though we have always maintained that we could split amicably for the children's sake if the need ever arose, he personally believed I would maliciously key his car and destroy his reputation, which quite frankly, was very astute of him. Because in the recesses of my soul, I think I might be pretty vindictive. Especially if our split were due to cheating on his part. I'm just saying.)

Anyway. I am having this fifth baby in two weeks. Did I mention it is a boy? Another boy? Like, my fourth boy? At first this was a source of bitterness for me, but then I remembered how I did this to myself by claiming repeatedly during childhood that I wanted to open a school for boys just like Jo March in Little Women (and sequels, of course). And so, here I am--living my childhood dreams. Lucky, lucky, lucky me.

But honestly, I just found out that my insurance here gives me FIVE days in the hospital for a C-section instead of the standard four I usually get. Quite frankly, I'd give birth to an elephant calf for that extra day.

Also on the bright side, (I'm trying to avoid complaining, as Rhett prefers me to save all my complaints for his ears only) the kids and I saved the life of a loon the other day, that had become entangled in mesh landscaping netting. Actually, I'm not sure if we saved it or not, since we free released it into the pond behind our house and hoped for the best, but I did cut off all the mesh stuff before we did that. I was going to take it to the Alabama Bird Sanctuary (or something like that) but that was an hour and a half drive away, and I'm not that committed to loon preservation. I'm not even sure they are endangered, actually. Probably they are super common.

If there were a topic to this post, this paragraph would be off-topic, but it's been making me smile for weeks now, and should really be documented somewhere. Spencer has been receiving love letters from a girl we know through school and church. He told me he wanted to write her one back. I glanced at it after he was finished and it read like this: "Audre--please don't try to ciss me. Also you should know that my name is spelled SPENCER--not SPINSER!" He looked at me knowingly and explained, "I think she spells it Southern." If you have ever heard his very Alabamian teacher say his name, I think you would have to agree.

I have so many more BRIGHT SPOTS in this pregnancy to document for you, but alas, it is time for school pick up. Just living my childhood dreams over here. You understand.


Jillybean said...

I have missed your posts :)You should blog more often, you know, in your spare time. Maybe with that extra day in the hospital you can write a bunch of posts.
Congrats on the upcoming new baby!

Jenny said...

congrats on another boy. we also have 4 boys and 1 girl. i'm not sure i can handle another girl if ours is any indication of what they are like. good luck! love seeing your posts pop up in my reader.

Wendie said...

As the mother of 2 boys (15 and 16) and 3 girls....let me just dodged a bullet.

julie said...

Thanks for making me laugh, Heidi! Four boys - that's a ticket to sainthood, right? My one boy is all I can handle sometimes, so it's a given that his sisters get neglected. Good luck with the delivery, and I'm sure you'll get some good reading in durng your extended hospital stay!

Jen said...

You know, I love all of your posts. And my dad, who is a stake president, makes the most EMBARRASSING remarks about things couples can do to choose the gender of their child. You would think some sort of Mormon secret police would fine him for things like that, but no. He keeps embarrassing me.

I feel a little nervous at this post, because I have a girl and then two boys, and I consider you like my soul sister. Does this mean I am destined to have only more boys? After my first boy I determined to have only more girls, and that didn't work. I even made a pink quilt for the third child, and then had to make another one at the last minute. Wow, I should have written a blog post in the time to write this comment.

Love your blog, good luck with this new one. He will be a lucky spud to have you for his mama.

chloereeseblog said...

Birth an elephant calf! I love it.